Tuesday, December 20, 2011

christmas love

so here it is the week before christmas and i am the picture of peace.  amazing.
yes - as you have read in my previous posts...i've been putting forth extra effort this year to keep my heart in the right posture as we wait for jesus.  as we anticipate and celebrate (without all of the usual madness).  i think this has definitely changed the way my family is experiencing the christmas season this year...but...i have also been given an early gift...
my peaceful state is most certainly due in part to the fact that i am currently relaxing at the beach for a few days while my kids are off sowing their wild oats with their grandparents.

no, really, i'm serious.

do you think i'm a terrible mother?  abandoning my children the week of christmas to take an impromptu trip with my husband down to sea island where he is recruiting at a golf tournament.

don't give me the guilt trip...i already took it.  it lasted about ten minutes.  this is the thought that ended it...
loving my children well starts with loving my husband well

does anyone else ever feel like their hearts are knitted to the hearts of their children?  when they are away from me there is a stretching that happens so that their connection to me remains and i feel the tension of a connection without the ability to actually touch them...to see them...to mother them.  i know that the needle threads in and out of our hearts countless times a day as i feed them, dress them, listen to them, teach them, love them in a million different ways...  with each deed the gentle threading of our hearts is strengthened.  it is with a joyful spirit of duty that this knitting happens over and over - day in and day out...

and meanwhile...unintentional neglect tends to creep in between my heart and the heart of my first love.  
it's a truth that all mothers must face...
the daily loving of our children can sometimes begin to sever the strands that once tied our hearts to the hearts of our husbands.

so for these few days my daily loving is completely focused on the man to whom i said 'i do' to...because when i said 'i do' what i meant was 'i will'...forever...
forever is a long time and you don't get there by ignoring the relationship that was the first chapter in the story of your family.

and in between all the precious moments that joey and i have together this week i am also finding time for my ultimate love.  in his heart i find that never-ending skein of yarn that must be woven into all the knitting that is done in my own heart and between the hearts of my family...it's stronger and softer and more vibrant in color than anything i could ever create on my own.  so...if loving my children well starts with loving my husband well - 
loving my husband well starts with loving my God well

so let me excuse myself as i scamper off to the beach to breath in the creation that was made for me by a God who loves me in abundance so that i have enough love for all the knitting that needs to be done...

and, by the way...this may seem like a random christmas week post, but it has everything to do with christmas...

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.  Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.   
This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him.  This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.  
Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.      
1 John 4:7-11