Sunday, April 27, 2014

if a mess surrounds you

One dish.
It was all I had unloaded when I stopped and looked around at the mess.
With both of them tucked in tight it was time to tackle the dinner dishes...and the lunch ones...and even a few still left from breakfast.  The kitchen was overwhelming enough but then I peaked into the school room where paper and stickers and stamps and coloring books and pencils and markers and crayons were strewn all around.  And I didn't even need to walk upstairs to know that the play room couldn't be crossed without stepping on something.  And the laundry...don't even get me started.  Wait...the backyard.  I totally forgot about the blanket and plates and cups and...

Everywhere I turned was a mess and as I put away that one dish I was prepared to tackle it all.
In the two hours I had before my own bedtime I was going to get that mess taken care of...but as I turned back to the dishwasher for the second dish my surroundings transformed.
My eyes no longer saw mess...they saw evidence.

Monday, April 21, 2014

easter {behind the scenes}

I rolled out of bed at 6:30 after two battles with the snooze button.
The day had promised warmth but the morning air still held a chill.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

depravity before prosperity :: a passion week post

{WARNING :: this post wound up longer than intended.  Every once in a while I feel compelled to do a whole lot of writing and not so much editing.  So I'm taking a deep breath and hitting publish.  Thanks for your grace.  And as always - I would love to hear your 'speak the truth in love' voice in this conversation.  I know I'm not alone in my wrestling so please, by all means, comment away!}
Depravity.

It means corruption but it goes deeper than that.  
Your computer can be corrupt.  A company can be corrupt.  
Depravity is the corruption of our very souls.

Acknowledging depravity in this world is acknowledging that something went terribly wrong shortly after perfect man was created in the perfect garden by the perfect God.  That 'something' is often called ‘sin’ and it immediately separated us from our God…our Creator.  
{Remember that whole bit with the sneaky serpent and the forbidden fruit?}
Sin reflects the depravity of man...and woman.  
You and me.

Yet even in that moment of original sin, when the bittersweet taste of rebellion was still on their tongues, God had it in mind to bring us back to himself.  

Monday, April 14, 2014

darkness before light :: a passion week post

From where I sit I can see the light breaking open in the sky like an egg in a frying pan.

It's one of the things that gets me out of bed in the morning.
My alarm goes off early and I wince.
Then I smell the coffee freshly brewed and waiting...and I remember that the sun won't wait.  If I want to watch it paint the first moments of the day I have to make my way downstairs and to my desk for my front row seat.
And so I rise.
To watch it rise.
And these last days leading to Easter I keep thinking about the One who rose.

We call it Passion Week.
By 'passion' we don't mean an intense desire or enthusiasm for something 
or an outburst of strong emotion, as Webster defines.
We mean suffering.

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

high fives and my messy beautiful

If you saw me high-fiving my friend Mary outside of preschool last week this is why.  Allow me to set the stage...

Thursday, April 3, 2014

first friday finds :: april 2014

{It's #firstfridayfinds time again and here's this month's unedited, 15 minutes worth of truth.  Please share yours at the bottom too!}

I had just finished scarfing down a bagel in my car when I read it.  {Sometimes when the kids aren't around I eat something that is not gluten-free...shhhh...don't tell}

I thought to myself - give him an inch and he takes a mile.
I give him a mustard seed and he moves a mountain.
I offer a quiet breath of a prayer and he writes big bold truths on my heart.
I sit in defiance and self-reliance and his love comes sweeping in to rescue me.

It was just another crazy busy day.  We all have them...despite the fact that I feed myself the lie that I am the CRAZIEST and BUSIEST person EVER.  {How's that for prideful?}

I had 15 minutes between finishing one appointment and the opening of the library {where I needed to swing by and pick up a book}.  I was literally thinking of what other errand or task I could squeeze into the 15 minutes so that I would not waste one. single. moment.
Crazy.
Busy.
Get my drift?

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

when freedom brings fear


The heavy iron gates clanged shut behind him, separating him from the prison that had been his home for years.  The suit he wore gave him a distinguished look more befitting of him now that he was no longer a convicted felon.  Despite being an old man he looked clean and fresh but his eyes told another story.  He gripped the seat on the bus with white knuckles…even the muscles in his face were unable to soften.  And as we watch Brooks Hatlen's painful transition back into the world his words are a haunting reminder of the effect years of imprisonment can have on a person...

Dear Fellas – 
I can’t believe how fast things move on the outside...  
The world went and got itself in a big damn hurry...  
I wake up scared  and sometimes it takes me a while to remember where I am...
Maybe I should get me a gun and rob the Foodway so they would send me home...  
I’m tired of being afraid all the time...  
I've decided not to stay.